more_than_actor: (serious)
[personal profile] more_than_actor
Sean almost missed the song as he pulled into the car park, but just as he reached for the radio to turn it off, he accidentally bumped the knob and changed the station. The lyrics he had not heard in years filling the auto:

Just a song before I go, a lesson to be learned, travelling twice the speed of sound, its easy to get burned.

The words echoed in his head as he checked in and went to the VIP lounge at Heathrow. A lesson indeed and a hard one it seemed for him, three marriages to women he had fallen for all too quickly, but then that had been his problem, going about with his heart out for any passing bird to nick up, yeah. He had let himself fall at the speed of sound, the sound of a sweet whisper in his ear late at night, his name falling from kiss-swollen lips that tasted of ale, cigarettes and passion.

A right silly bloke he’d been over each one of them, worse than a sixth form girl swooning over some cricket player she fancied who’d finally taken notice and found her heart following her knickers into his grasp. He fell too fast and too hard each time and each time, it had ended up the same way. Each ex-wife said the same thing, he wasn’t who they’d thought he was going to be, he was gone too much, hung with his mates too much, paid them too little attention.

Sweet Debra, his first love and his first lover, what a great bird she was, with a laugh that seemed to bring out the sunshine on the gloomiest Northern day and skin like the finest cream. They’d had a good marriage, lots of laughs, but he’d been bitten well and proper by the acting bug and Debra had no taste for the charms of London. They had gone their separate ways, but once he had started making some decent money, he’d settled a fair piece on her even though she was remarried. Only seemed fair to him that she get a little of her own back, after all it had been Debra who had pushed him to go ahead and take that first acting class at Rotherham.

Then along came Melanie and he fell again, just as fast and hard, but this time it hadn’t been as good, Melanie was looking for something he wasn’t, she wanted the illusion that he built on stage, not the regular bloke from Sheffield. Parties and glamour was her thing and footie and the pub with good mates were his. They had both been close to throwing in the towel when Melanie came up pregnant with Lorna. Things had been very good for a long while after that, both of them in love with their daughter and trying to be good parents; of course, he hadn’t been home as much, off filming. Then they decided to marry and things went downhill pretty fast, but with Lorna and later Molly to think of, neither had been willing to break things off.

After he started filming Sharpe, things settled for a bit between the two of them, but Melanie finally had enough and tossed him out. He’d done his best to change and make things right for the sake of the girls, he and Mel going back and forth, home again then another separation off and on for nearly two years. He’d come home from filming yet another Sharpe to find the summons to the bar for a divorce and that had been that.

Just after his first meeting with Melanie and the lawyers, he’d gone round to a pub for a good pisser and ran into Abigail, whom he’d been working with on Sharpe. They’d gotten drunk, well he’d gotten drunk and she’d seen him back to the flat he taken. That had been on a Thursday and she hadn’t left for a week, at first just holding his hand and listening while he’d moaned over his marriage. What in bloody hell led him to kiss her, he couldn’t rightly say, but he woke on Sunday afternoon with a foul taste in his mouth, a pounding head and an armful of Abigail. That had been in June, he’d signed the Bill of Divorce in August and married Abigail in November.

He’d tried very hard with Abby and was thrilled beyond words at the birth of Evie. Truth be told, he and Abby should have left it at a bit of slap and tickle and parted friends, but he’d fallen again and his working class morals said marriage. It had taken two weeks to convince Abigail to give it a go, but he had finally worn down all her arguments against it.

There had been plenty of sly comments about the timing of their marriage, but gossips and busybodies aside, he had been completely faithful to Melanie and never touched Abigail until after Melanie had made it clear nothing he could say would see them putting things back together again.

He had really thought he and Abigail could make a go of it, yeah. He’d settled down quite a bit, was home more than he had been with Melanie. Then came the chance to play Boromir and at first Abigail had been behind him 100 percent, but then the separation began to wear away at her. He’d just come in from a ghastly day of filming in New Zealand that had lasted well past dark and found her letter waiting in the post. She had broken it off in a bloody letter, not even by phone or waiting the two weeks until he would be home for a short break, but in the sodding post.

God, what a shocker that had been, yeah. Set him reeling for a while, until Viggo had noticed how offput he was. Good old Viggo, dear old mate. The American had shown up on his stoop with plenty of drink and a willing ear. He’d seen Sean through a right pisser and nursed him through the morning after, pretending not to notice when the Brit cried, but listening intently to his drunken ramble on the perfidies of the fairer sex. His mate had helped him draw out the worst of the pain like poison from a wound and then steadied him until he could stand on his own again.

One thing the split with Abigail had shown him for good and all was that he had to guard his heart more carefully. Keep it in close and not give it away to a pretty face and a nice pair of breasts. He was fairly well done in on women as far as the long term went, he’d take his pleasure with willing partners, but keep his hasty heart locked up tight. No more falling at the speed of sound, that only got you burnt, aye? He’d been burnt too often to want to risk that pain again. His lesson was learnt right proper and he wouldn’t make the same mistake again, yeah.


more_than_actor: (Default)

July 2008


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